Sunday, October 12, 2008

free

FREE by Ginny Owens

Turnin' molehills into mountains
Makin' big deals out of small ones
Bearing gifts as if they're burdens
This is how it's been
Afraid of coming out of my shell
Too many things I can't do too well
Afraid I'll try real hard
And I'll fail
This is how it's been
Till the day You pounded on my heart's door
And You shouted joyfully
You're not a slave anymore!

CHORUS:
You're free to dance
Forget about your two left feet
And you're free to sing
Even joyful noise is music to Me
You're free to love
'Cause I've given you My love
And it's made you free
I have set you free!

My mind finds hard to believe
That You became humanity and
Changed the course of history
Because You loved us so
And my heart cannot understand
How You accept me as I am
But You say You've always had a plan
And that's all I need to know
So when I am consumed
With what the world will say
Then You're singing to me, as You remove
my chains

Free from worry
Free from envy and denial
Free to live, free to give, free to smile

Friday, October 10, 2008

Psalm 55... Think it through

If you couldn't tell, I'm starting a new thing on my blog which I'm calling "Think it Through". I'm starting out on Psalm 55, but may very well focus on just one verse, or a poem, or some thing that happens in everyday life and how it all relates spiritually. Since lately my friends and I have been going through some pretty troublesome, confusing things, when i was reading this the other day, I decided to talk about it on here... kinda break it down, ya know...

anyway, please follow this link:
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2055&version=31
to read Psalm 55 online. You can change it to any version you want, but I'll be quoting from NIV. and you're welcome to read it in your own bible if you want. =)

I'm sure we've all had times when we feel like God's not listening to us. In these first 2 verses, David's basically begging for God to hear him. I don't know about you, but I've had times when I've gone to God pretty distraught. some of those times have been posted on here. I've been thinking "God, why is this happening? Why now? Why all at once? God, I'm getting so depressed it scares me! This is not who I want to become! Why aren't you listening??? My heart is HURTING, God. really hurting. I'm scared, I don't know what to do."
and looking back on those times, seeing these first few verses, it is so comforting to know that I'm not some weirdo. David- THE MAN AFTER GOD'S OWN HEART!- was in the same place I was.
"I said, 'Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest- I would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm.'"
He wants to escape, to run away from it all, just like I did- and still sometimes do! I am not alone. Decades, centuries ago, David went through this and made it. People have been going through this for ages upon ages, and yet I have the selfishness to think that God's left me in the dust and cares nothing about me, out of the blue? He's been helping us through this- every single one of us- for longer than forever. And yet we doubt him.
But somehow, it feels reasonable to doubt his "perfect will" when "a man like myself, my companion, my close friend, with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship," turns against me.
and in the midst of all these horribly painful (yet able to relate to) events, David finds the faith to call on God. I can imagine him lying in his bed, tears streaming down both his cheeks, so much so that he can't see his hand in front of his face. Crying out in distress- whimpering, groaning, yelling. "GOD! SAVE ME!!!! it HURTS! Oh, God. I can't do this. I can't. I don't want to. Why? Do you even hear me? But you have to! GOD, SAVE ME! HEAR MY CRY AND RESCUE ME FROM THIS NIGHTMARE!"
and he swoops in- if he hasn't yet, he WILL- and ransoms you.
RANSOMS you. a ransom indicates paying to get something back- which is exactly what he did. He paid, with his very life, to get you back. And you can't give him the one small portion of your heart that he says "let go of it."?
"Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall."
... but, our righteousness is as filthy rags! doesn't that mean I'll fall?
If you are in Christ, you are a new Creation. (2 Cor. 5:17) He has blessed you with grace and covered you in his righteousness. Trust him.
Only trust him.

the loss

CW/TW: pregnancy and miscarriage  Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. I’ve thought about how to word this for so long, debat...