ponderful life.

I kind of love life right now. even though I don't understand much of anything... somehow I feel as if I'm gliding through on a layer of joy and peace. is that a God-thing? I think so. for the first time in forever it feels like I'm completely happy. settled with friends. growing in Christ. at peace with family. and (as always) it kinda scares me. but you know what? I really don't care. because every time I start caring about what might be coming, or worrying about what ifs, it seems like I cause those things to happen. but when I just relax... let go, and let God... he works it all out. and you'd think I'd know that by now, from all the millions of times that I've realized this. but somehow I can't seem to put it into action each time. but then if I could, why would I need Him to remind me, right? ugh, I'm thinking in circles again. I could stand some sleep...