Monday, April 28, 2008

rain=God's Words?

Isaiah 55:10-11
"As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."

I got to really thinking about this passage friday.
I'd heard verse 11 before, but I hadn't heard verse 10 until I read it for my W2R homework.
The question was something to the effect of "How does Isaiah compare rain and snow to God's words?"
so I got to thinking, I mean really thinking.
and for those of you that know me, you know those pondering moments are not all to rare, in fact, though I may seem ditzy and "blonde" to some, I am quite a ponderer.
so I'm thinking, Ok.
God's words=rain.
His words fall on us ("rain" on us). When rain comes, what does it do?
It cleanses, nourishes, and makes things grow.
So God's Words cleanse us, nourish us, and make us grow.
But that's not all. Rain evaporates back up into the atmosphere and forms more clouds, right? So, technically, the rain falls, soaks in, the goes back up.
So should God's word do in our lives.
It rains on us (causing cleansing, nourishing, and growth). Then our growth (the fruits we have yielded by listening to, hearing, and obeying God's Words) goes back to God- just like it says should happen in Matthew 5:16- "In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."
So, we show our fruits (which the rain has helped grow) in our lives, people see those fruits, and it all goes back to God, in praise.
just though I'd share that. =)

Saturday, April 26, 2008

today we had the block party at Collegeville. it was so awesome, and a great opportunity to pour God's love into some kids' lives. I got REALLY sunburned tho, and right now I'm pretty miserable.

so I got to thinking earlier. about how much a suburn can be applied to our spiritual life. see, we go out into the world thinking "Ok, I'm ready to go. I'm kinda [spiritually] pale, but it's overcast, i won't need sunscreen. besides, I don't burn, I tan. and tans are cool." (translation: I'm going into the world, I'm not very mature spiritually, but it doesn't look that bad out there. I won't need protection. anyway, even if i do get a little influence, it won't hurt me. I'll just look cooler to others.) then we get out there and after a little while, we realize we're getting influenced by the world. we're like, "well, it's not that bad. it'll just hurt me a little, but I'll forget it eventually." then other people start pointing it out to us... "whoa, you're really giving into the influence of the world lately. i'm getting kinda worried about you! maybe you should go seek after God and put on some spiritual 'sunscreen'." and we respond "oh no, I'll be ok. really, i don't get influenced that easily, it just appears that way. that's how I am, i'm just outgoing." then we start hurting, and we think "well, maybe I should at least get out of this situation for a little while till I'm sure I'm ok." and once we get under the "shade" of God's righteous covering, we realize how influenced we really were. and we begin to hurt. to burn, and chill, and burn again. it's miserable. and we want to complain to someone, but then it would just make it even worse. so God brings out his aloe vera, his peace and love and mercy and grace and righteousness and pours it over our souls, and soothes the hurt. and when we start hurting again, he pours it over us again, until we're healed. granted, we're never the same once we've been influenced by or experienced these wordly things. But God forgives us and eases our conscience, helps us to get through it and in the end, still be a whole person. and though God would rather not see us go through the pain of that spiritual sunburn, sometimes we make ourselves go through it without knowing it. and once we get in the middle of it, there's no stopping it. but God always brings good out of the situation and finds a lesson to teach us- even if it's something as simple as "trust me, you ALWAYS need sunscreen."

Sunday, April 20, 2008

a prayer

God, I'm really confused right now. I know what happened Thursday happened for a reason. but I don't know the reason! and that human-ness about me is just itching to know- you know that. Please help me to trust you- I'm really having trouble with that lately. and not just you- I'm having trouble trusting everyone. I kind of have a feeling that maybe I'm starting to build up walls, just to see who cares enough to get through to them. and I don't want to do that!!! I want to be spilling over with your love and full of grace. I want to be someone that is loving and merciful and compassionate- that everyone knows they can come to me and I won't judge them, I'll just be there for them to talk to and that they can cry on my shoulder-- cuz that's what my heart really is!! and you know that. But I want them to know that. But I'm so scared that I'll make myself vulnerable only to be hurt more. And I don't want to be hurt any more than I have to be. please help me to figure this out. I LOVE you, Lord. Do your will in my life- I choose to trust you completely.

sweet release

i wrote this about a week ago right after going through some stormy "weather" in life...
sweet release
lyrics by: me

i close my eyes and start to pray
but, God, you seem 10 worlds away.
i'm tired of my burdens
and all these heavy doubts
i feel like i'm in a glass cage-
i'm so ready to be out.

so carry me
i cast my cares
my worries
my dreams
and all my prayers.
hold me,
keep my heart
cuz i'm about
to fall apart.

i'm not quite sure what else to say
my mind's been dulled through this long day
but, Lord, you see my heart straight through
you know my thoughts
and motives too.
heavy silence wraps around me...


i can feel the tears build up
the hot, salty tears- there's no cover-up
and slowly, as i let go
i begin to feel at ease
and i suppose this is what you mean
when you tell of sweet release


no sooner than the tears slow
do i once again go
to that enchanting land
of "oh, IF ONLY..."
and much sooner than planned
i'm once again being torn apart.


Lord, rescue me from my self
leave those useless, hollow dreams on the shelf--
replace them with your peace,
and keep my heart steadfast.
drown me with your sweet release
and give me sleep tonight.

Monday, April 07, 2008


why do girls flirt so much? i'm not saying i'm completely against flirting. i admit, i flirt occasionally... or should i say rarely... but some girls (and guys) just flirt incessantly. and it is SO annoying! is it just that those people think they won't be liked/noticed if they don't flirt?
help me out here.
honestly, i'm kinda mad at a couple people right now.
and i need to chillax.
so, i'm wondering WHY?!?!

welcome to midnight.

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