compellllllllll

sometimes I sit down and set this laptop on my knees with a specific topic on my mind that's molding itself into a wonderful blog post... tonight is not that night. tonight is the night that reality hits me. tonight is the night that I wonder why I'm still up at 11:15 when I've already finished my homework, yet it feels like there is something I need to be blogging and getting off my chest, but I'm really not very sure what it is. tonight is the night that my head is still pounding trying to relieve all the stress of the day. tonight is the night I wonder if I will ever be found- as in, found by a man who will one day love me and be my husband.

and I know that sounds cheesy, and probably pretty desperate, but I really think God does crazy things with prayer and ties your heart to the people you consistently pray for... so I guess it only makes sense that my heart is so burdened for my DFH, and that I hope to be found by him, since through my prayers for his life, God is weaving us together without our even knowing each other. this blows my mind.

but like one of my favorite women, Beth Moore, told me: "If you give God your mind, He will blow it for you."

I would like for you to keep blowing my mind, God. keep moving in ways that I can't even imagine. I love it when you do that. I love being surprised by You.

I'm so exhausted by trying to propel myself through each day... which reminds me how stupid that is and makes me tell myself, NO WONDER YOU ARE WORN OUT, BECCA. When I do everything myself, of my own power, it just drains me cause there is nothing there to replenish it.

solution?

be compelled by His love.

DING DING DING! WE HAVE A WINNER!

When I do everything with His joy & love & peace & power, it replenishes me as I minister to others. good option. can I take that one? Yes. I will.

I will.

Compel me with Your love.